Posts that spark a mental or emotional “AHA!” that changes how you see yourself/life

The Invisible Ropes We Learn in Childhood

When elephants are young, trainers tie them to a small wooden stake with a rope. The baby elephant pulls and struggles, tries to escape. But the rope holds, and eventually the elephant stops trying. Years later that same elephant is enormous and powerful enough to rip the post out of the ground without effort. But it doesn’t. Because somewhere along the way it learned a quiet conclusion: I can’t break this rope.

Breaking the Loop: When Clients Trigger You

None of that was in the message. That was the story I was layering on top of it. Underneath that story were old beliefs: being “good” meant being available. Being valuable meant being fast. Saying no meant risking rejection, and every request felt like a threat, which meant my nervous system reacted accordingly.

Dating the Same Personality in a Different Body

We don’t chase bad partners. We chase unfinished childhood patterns. Chemistry is often just recognition. The body saying, I know this. I survived this before. But survival isn’t the same as safety. Try This ... Think about your “type.” Not their personality — the emotional experience. Do you feel Anxious? Chosen? Ignored? Like you’re earning something? Now ask yourself: Where have I felt this before?

Positive vibes are powerful. But they’ll never beat out survival patterns.

Positive vibes are powerful. But they don’t automatically dismantle survival patterns. That’s grown-woman work. Do I sometimes wish I’d figured it out sooner? Of course. But the journey doesn’t end. Sometimes a wound looks healed, and then it shows up in a new disguise. The difference now is that I don’t panic. I recognise it. Each time it resurfaces, I meet it with more awareness and less drama. I’m healing at deeper layers. That’s the work.

What Are Triggers?

You probably know exactly what being triggered feels like. Maybe it’s the guy who cuts you off in traffic. Or the family member who won’t stop ranting about their views that directly oppose yours. Maybe it’s a sudden memory of something painful, or a client who treats your workday like it belongs to them. We’ve all been there. But let’s get curious — what is a trigger, really? A trigger is an emotional reaction that flares up in response to something happening in the present, often tied to past pain. Our inner caveman (hi, survival brain!) loves linking pain to anything around us at the time of the hurt. It’s how our ancestors survived long enough to make more humans.

Start Clearing Your Snake Room

If I look back at my history of spiritual development, I notice a stop-start relationship with my spiritual practises. For instance, I start meditating and gaining some momentum with it, and then I stop, I get triggered, and feel as though I moved back. I wondered why this kept happening to me, and one day I remembered a story from a project management seminar I went to many years ago.